Relativity Read online

  Tate leads me down the long hallway and out into a grand foyer area with thirty-foot vaulted ceilings. Stained glass windows border the massive oak front doors. Tucked away in a corner is a coffee bar dotted with several small two-seater tables in front of it. It bothers me immensely that I didn’t notice any of this when I came in.

  We walk up to the counter and a girl I recognize from school, but can’t remember her name, smiles timidly at me. Obviously, she knows why I’m here.

  “I’m so sorry about your mom, Ripley,” she says, wiping a coffee spill off the counter with a wet rag. I smile at her, not able to force another thank you from my lips today.

  “What would you like?” Tate asks innocently.

  The familiar smell of the coffee roasting hits my nostrils and my head instantly starts to spin. A million memories of pulling through Starbucks with my mom every morning before school for the last two years hit me like a truck. I sway unsteadily on my feet and Tate grabs my shoulders. Is this how my life is going to be now? Every innocent thing that triggers a memory of Mom feeling like a dagger driving through my chest?

  Tate and the coffee girl are asking me if I’m okay but their voices sound muffled like they are in a tunnel. It’s too much. I break loose of Tate’s grip and bolt straight for the massive oak doors nearly mowing a few people over in the process. Once the crisp fall air hits my tear-streaked face I start running and don’t stop until I’m sure no one is following me.

  Chapter Two

  I run out of steam pretty quickly and I’m still a mile away from my house. In hindsight, I could have been a little smarter about my nervous breakdown, not to mention the fact that I’ll never be able to look at Tate Boyd again. My phone singsongs and I pull it out and fire back a quick text letting Nat know I’m okay. Not the same okay as I was a week ago, but I guess okay for the moment in this new normal. She texts back telling me that she let Dad know I’m okay. I hadn’t even given a thought to how my disappearing act would affect him.

  I just couldn’t stand one more minute in that church with everyone looking at me. I know I’m not technically an orphan, but I’m a half-orphan which makes me feel like people are going to be labeling me the rest of my life. I just want to go back to the only time anyone would stare at me was if I was having a particularly bad hair day.

  I hear gravel crunching behind me and realize that a car is slowing down. Could the universe really be so cruel as to let my father lose his wife then his daughter gets kidnapped by some crazed serial killer passing through town? Surely not. The car stops beside me, but I don’t even turn my head. I just keep walking, picking up my pace a little.

  The car keeps rolling next to me then I hear a window slide down.

  “Ripley’s Believe It or Not?” a familiar voice asks curiously.

  I stop cold in my tracks, knowing that there is only one person on the planet that has ever called me that. “Knox?” I answer, turning toward the car. I blink the remaining tears out of my eyes to get a better look inside the car.

  The last time I saw Natalie’s brother, Knox, it was the weekend before he left for Navy boot camp, almost four years ago. The clean cut guy behind the steering wheel doesn’t even remotely resemble the Knox I used to know.

  “Holy shit, you look different,” I say, laughing. I would never admit it to Natalie but this cleaned up version of her older brother has brightened up my afternoon considerably.

  “Different good or different bad?” he asks self-consciously, leaning over to hold open the passenger side door for me to get in.

  “Just different,” I lie, hesitating. Then, it hits me that I’ve already worn three blisters on my feet from these damn heels and I can’t walk any further. I slide into the buttery leather seat and immediately slide my shoes off.

  “Jesus, Rip. I just bought this car,” Knox teases, waving his hand in front of his face glancing down at my shoeless feet.

  “Shut it, Parsons. Just drive,” I command, buckling my seat belt then sinking back into the head rest.

  “God, you’re just as bossy as you used to be,” he says but speeds up. “What in the world are you doing out here all alone anyway? I was just on my way to the church.”

  I glance over and see that he is wearing an evergreen-colored button-down with khaki-colored cargo pants. Not exactly a three piece suit but definitely dressy for Knox, whose standard outfit used to consist of ripped up jeans and a threadbare Led Zeppelin T-shirt. I run my eyes over him, noticing that the Navy has filled him out quite a bit, his bulging arms straining his shirt sleeves. His closely cropped brown hair looks so much better than the shaggy shoulder-length mop he used to keep.

  “It was too intense,” I finally answer. I notice his jaw tense and I hate that I just made the only normal conversation I’ve had in a week turn awkward.

  “I’ve got some chilled vodka at home,” Knox offers, brushing off the awkwardness. “Wait, how old are you?” He steals a glance at me, joking.

  “I turned eighteen two weeks ago,” I announce proudly, not believing that the surprise birthday party Mom threw for me was just fourteen days ago. I was so happy that night and so clueless about my future. I feel a cloud start to descend over me but I mentally swipe it away. I just want to forget about my mom being in the ground for one night. “Get me drunk, Knox.”

  He smiles wickedly and speeds up. I don’t even ask where he is taking me. I’ve known Knox almost my whole life, even though we’ve been out of touch for the last four years, and I know he won’t let anything bad happen to me. I’ll text Natalie later and she can come join us. It’ll be the three of us hanging out, just like old times. Back when shit wasn’t so complicated.

  ******

  A few minutes later, we pull into the driveway of a beautiful brick house I’ve always admired on the opposite side of town as our house.

  “What, are you their pool boy or something?” I tease, knowing Knox could never afford a house like this.

  “I’m renting out their carriage house, smart ass,” he counters, pulling the car off the main driveway, winding around the back to a quaint-looking two car garage. A set of black iron stairs curls around the side of the garage leading to the loft above. I immediately love it.

  “I was just messing with you. This is awesome,” I say, opening my car door and gingerly stepping out, knowing there is no way I’ll get my shoes back on now that I took them off.

  Knox gets out and locks his car then leads the way upstairs. I wish I could be as comfortable with Tate as I am with Knox. If I was following Tate up to an apartment where we could be alone, I would probably be breaking out in hives. There is such a comforting familiarity about Knox that I feel safe and grounded for the first time in four days.

  “I’m just going to apologize, I didn’t expect to have anyone up here,” he declares, looking embarrassed. Splotches dot his cheeks and I can’t get over how cute it is that he seems genuinely concerned that I might care how his place looks. I follow him up the stairs. He unlocks the door and gestures for me to go ahead of him. I can’t believe this totally hot gentleman used to cut silent farts then rush out of the room leaving Natalie and I gagging.

  “I’m sure it’s fine,” I say, stepping past him into the space.

  I put my shoes down near the front door as Knox locks the door behind us and places his keys on a hook by the front door. He flips on the lights because the daylight outside is starting to fade. I brace myself, knowing how sloppy Knox used to be and remembering the many times I heard his mom screaming at him to clean up his room. To my surprise, the space is neat and tidy and even smells fresh. He surprises me by pulling my jacket off me and hanging it on another hook. The gesture is so sweet that I can hardly stand it. The Navy really changed Knox.

  Not that he needed changing because he has always been a pretty good guy, but now he’s a man. I feel sort of immature in his presence and it really is sweet that he’s taking pity on me.

  He gestures to a small loveseat and I plop down, feeling the wei
ght of the last few days start to lift just the tiniest bit. A giant bookshelf in the corner is full of framed pictures and military paraphernalia.

  “How about a little Coke with your vodka?” Knox offers, moving over to a small kitchenette and pulling a bottle of vodka from a small freezer area inside his refrigerator.

  “More vodka than Coke,” I reply, needing something to take the edge off. I’m not exactly what you would call a binge drinker like some of the kids at school, but I won’t deny the power of alcohol to deaden the senses a bit and I need that tonight.

  “You know I’m contributing to a minor, right?” he says, winking at me.

  The wink makes my pulse jump, even though I know he only means it in a friendly way. My eyes drift to the giant bed in the corner of the room with its masculine navy and burgundy-striped bedspread. I can’t help but wonder how many girls have been in it so far. Knox was quite the player in high school and he didn’t look nearly as good as he does now. I shake off the weird thought.

  “Oh, please, we’ve been drinking together for years,” I tease, reminding him of the time that Nat and I broke into her Dad’s liquor cabinet when Knox was supposed to be keeping an eye on us. The only place he was keeping his eyes were his girlfriend’s chest.

  “How could I forget? You two were the worst cock blockers,” he jokes, dropping ice cubes into some glasses for us.

  Knox was always very popular with the ladies and I’m sure this new and approved Knox won’t have any trouble finding many willing women to service him. The thought makes my stomach flutter strangely so I change the subject.

  “Nat is going to be furious that we started without her. She really missed you,” I tell him, accepting the drink he is holding out to me. I completely expected to be drinking out of some obscure mismatched mugs but Knox settles himself at the opposite end of the loveseat holding a matching glass tumbler like the one he handed me. It is kind of tripping me out how grown up he seems to be.

  “I missed you guys, too,” he says, flipping on the flat screen directly across from us. I don’t miss that he is talking about me also and I feel guilty that I didn’t say I missed him because I actually did, I just didn’t let myself think about him after a while because it hurt too bad. “It wouldn’t have killed you to send a letter, you know.” He is staring straight ahead with no emotion on his face.

  “I’m really sorry, Knox. I thought you would get back on Facebook eventually and I guess I just got caught up in life,” I stammer, then take a giant swig of my drink.

  He turns toward me, laughing. “I was totally fucking with you. Rip, you were always so easy to mess with.”

  His words seem convincing, but there is an edge to his voice that I don’t ever remember hearing before. I guess it was kind of shitty of me not to even acknowledge him for four years.

  “I’m really glad you’re back, Knox.” I admit, pulling my legs under me, trying not to wince at the pain of the blisters under my pantyhose. “By the way, this drink is freaking weak, dude.”

  “I don’t feel like taking care of your drunk ass,” he teases, flipping through the channels.

  “Those are fighting words,” I tell him, hobbling off the couch and into the kitchen area. I pull open the freezer and grab the vodka, dumping a half-inch worth into my nearly empty glass.

  “Oh, Jesus. I’m texting Nat to get her ass over here and babysit,” he says, pulling his phone out of his pants pocket. My heart falls a little at the thought of Nat crashing our party. I love her like a sister but she takes up so much space when she’s in a room that there isn’t any room for anyone else. Metaphorically, of course. I’m just really enjoying the playful banter Knox and I have going on. I feel relaxed for the first time since Mom died.

  Knox seems to pick up on my mood and lays his phone on a table next to the couch. “Actually, I don’t think I have the energy for her tonight. Is that okay with you?” he asks.

  “She’s been really great since…you know,” I say, feeling like I need to defend her. “I couldn’t have gotten through any of this without her.”

  Knox looks uncomfortable and stares straight ahead at the screen. I wish I wouldn’t have acted weird about Nat coming over, I don’t want him to get the wrong impression. I go back around the couch and sit down, glad to be off my feet again. I must make a noise because Knox looks over.

  “I can’t believe how grown up you are, Rip. Natalie, too. I guess I thought everything was just going to stay the same after I left, but things couldn’t be more different,” he says, sadness filling his voice. I have a feeling that he is referring to the growing tension in his parent’s marriage. Natalie tries to blow it off but I’ve sensed problems for years.

  “I even got my boobies,” I joke, thrusting my chest out, in an attempt to make him laugh. I just want to pretend that Knox and I are hanging out like old times.

  “I sort of noticed that,” he admits, blushing. I know I should be embarrassed, knowing that Knox obviously checked out my chest, but for some reason I kind of like it.

  “How many chicks have you deflowered in that bed?” I ask, nodding toward his perfectly-made bed across the room.

  “Those days are over. I’m done objectifying women. I just want a meaningful relationship with someone who shares my same interests.”

  I freeze, my drink halfway to my mouth before I realize that he is just messing with me. We both start laughing hysterically. Knox laid more pipe than a plumber in high school and he didn’t look nearly as hot as he does now.

  “Oh, that was classic Knox,” I says, catching my breath. I hold my empty glass out toward him and rattle my ice cubes. “Another please, good sir.”

  “You better slow your roll, lightweight,” he says, taking the glass from me. Our fingers touch as he takes the glass from me and I don’t hate the way it feels. He moves to the kitchen area and pours me another drink.

  “I’ve built up a tolerance since that Wild Turkey incident.”

  Knox laughs, his voice so much deeper than I ever remember, and it floats over me like a warm blanket.

  “You guys were so pathetic. You snuck maybe a shot’s worth of Dad’s booze and acted like you were tore up from the floor up. It was hilarious. I still have a picture from that night,” he says, gesturing toward the bookcase.

  “We just did it to get on your girlfriend’s nerves. Natalie really hated her.” I hobble over to the bookcase and see a framed photo of Natalie and I with our arms around each other, our faces flushed more from the excitement of drinking for the first time than the actual alcohol. It makes me deliriously happy that Knox has this picture after all these years.

  “We look so young,” I comment, touching the picture.

  “I’ve been staring at that picture for four years so you can imagine my surprise when I saw you today,” he says, handing me a fresh drink. I take the drink from him, careful not to graze his hand this time.

  He just stares at me with this strange expression that I can’t read then shakes his head. The air between seems to change and I can’t stop staring at his lips. There is only one thing that this could mean: the vodka is kicking in. I move back to the couch, praying that Knox didn’t pick up on my weird vibe.

  I take a long sip, noticing that Knox made this drink considerably stronger than the last. “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ bout,” I tease, holding my glass out to clink with his. He leans toward me and gently taps his glass against mine.

  “To the most intriguing girl I know,” he says sweetly.

  I don’t know if it is his heartfelt toast, or the whiff I got of his intoxicating cologne, but my heart is racing. Time seems to stop as neither of us moves. I feel my tongue dart across my lips and the action seems to make Knox swallow aggressively. We both shake off the moment and shrug back into our respective corners of the couch.

  “Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?” he asks, and I wonder if the vodka is starting to work on him now. He’s probably just trying to be kind and take my mind off Mom.
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  Several seconds go by as my brain tries to process what Knox just said to me. It’s no use, the compliment gets spit back out by my stubborn self-consciousness.

  “I’m not beautiful,” I challenge him, feeling awkward.

  “Yes, you fucking are. You’ve always been pretty, but now that you’re all grown up, you’re beautiful. I’m not trying to be some creeper, but a fact is a fact.” He takes a swig of his drink, looking uncomfortable.

  “Thanks, creeper,” I say jokingly so that he knows I’m not going to take his sweet comment to heart.

  “Are you still dating Andrew?” he asks nonchalantly.

  Hearing Drew’s name come out of Knox’s mouth shocks me. I had no idea that Knox even knew about my ex. Natalie must have bored him stiff talking about my drama when she called him.

  “I caught him screwing Piper Pugh in the backseat of his car at lunch one day,” I admit, cracking up. It wasn’t nearly as funny when I recognized Andrew’s bare ass pumping up and down that day, but I’m finally over it.

  “What a dick.” He throws a punch toward Andrew’s imaginary face and spills some of his drink on his pants. “Oh, shit.”

  He sets his drink down on the coffee table and strolls across the room to a chest of drawers.

  “I’m gonna change, I’ll be right back,” he says, disappearing into the kitchen area. I hear a door shut and realize that his bathroom must be next to the kitchen. I drain my drink and head to the kitchen to refill it.

  I’m pouring Coke into my glass when he opens the bathroom door and emerges wearing navy blue shorts and a white V-neck T-shirt. The shirt is stretched against his considerable chest and even though I know I’m gawking, I almost can’t look away. I want to touch him so bad I can hardly stand it.

  “No more vodka for you, missy,” he says, coming toward me. He is probably right, the way I’m feeling right now the last thing I need is a bigger buzz to make me braver. “I mean it,” he says, eyeballing my left hand on the vodka bottle. He puts both his hands on my hips and squeezes by me in the tiny space. I nearly pass out it feels so good. Jesus, I’m losing it.